November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Ah, Children

| Calgary, AB, Canada | Top

(A customer approaches with her 2 year old son in arms, and her 5 year old daughter. As she is about to order, a customer from a few minutes earlier storms in front of her. She is yelling and screaming incoherently, and throws her drink on the counter.)

Daughter, to her mother: “Mummy, why is the lady yelling?”

Mother: “Never mind it, she’s just being rude.”

(The little girl scowls, and points at the customer.)

Daughter: “You cut that out right now! You need to be more polite!”

(Taking example from his sister, the toddler starts pointing and yelling.)

Toddler: “BAD! BAD!”

(The irate customer is embarrassed. She shuts up and storms out. The little girl gets a free hot chocolate.)

Ah, Parents

When Intelligence Is Tempered

| OK, USA | Uncategorized

(I am talking to a customer about vaccines for dogs.)

Me: “The normal shots we give annually are distemper, parvo, rabies, and bordatella.”

Customer: “Okay. I wanted to be sure the distemper shot was part of it. My dog needs that.”

Me: “Okay. Would you like me to make an appointment for you?”

Customer: “Sure. Now, how long after the distemper shot will it take effect?”

Me: “What do you mean, take effect?”

Customer: “How long until my dog is nicer?”

An Abbreviation Abberation

| Humboldt, CA, USA | Uncategorized

(I’ve just finished making a sandwich for a customer. I am new at this, so he double checks what I do.)

Customer: “Did you forget anything?”

Me: “No, sir.”

Customer: “Are you sure? You remembered the cucumbers and turkey?”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: “And the lettuce?”

Me: “And the tomatoes, pickles, mustard and mayo, sir. It’s written on the–”

Customer: “Mayo? What the h*** is that? And you left out the mayonnaise! Why did you do that?”

Me: “But, that’s what I said.”

Customer: “No! You said mayo! That’s not what I wanted!”

Me: “I put in mayonnaise. Mayo is just an abbreviation.”

Customer: “Abbreviation? What’s that, some kind of fruit?”

The Very Social Network

| MI, USA | Uncategorized

(I am trying to help an elderly couple get on the internet.)

Me: “Okay. Go ahead and see if you are able to connect.”

Customer: “I can’t. It says that I am not connected to any networks.”

Me: “That’s odd. I can see you on the network.”

Customer: *amazed* “You can see me?”

Me: “Yes, I can see you.”

Customer: *shocked* “Wow, she can see me!”

Customer’s husband: *in the background* “Well, put some clothes on woman!”

Raisin Wine Awareness

| TX, USA | Uncategorized

(A customer comes up to the counter, and looks at a bottle of wine we’re sampling.)

Customer: “What’s this?”

Me: “It’s a tempranillo.”

Customer: “What is a ‘temper-nillo’?”

Me: “It’s a red grape from Spain.”

(The customer picks up the sample cup, and looks at it in confusion.)

Customer: “This is a grape? I could’ve sworn this was wine.” *knocks sample back* “How about that!”