October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

The Quandaries of Laundry

| Illinois, USA | Uncategorized

(I am straightening a rack of clothes when I overhear two customers.)

Customer #1: *examines the tag on a shirt* “It says ‘Hand Wash Only’. If I buy this, could I borrow your hand washer?”

Customer #2: “I don’t think I own a hand washer.”

Customer #1: “Darn!” *puts the shirt back and walks away*

It’s Gonna Be A Long Call, Part 5

| Louisiana, USA | Uncategorized

(I work as a tech support agent at a university. I receive a call from a woman working in another office, asking if she can direct a student to me to assist with setting up his email account. A minute later, I receive a call from a young man.)

Me: “[University] Computing Call Center.”

Caller: “Hi, I’m trying to get my password.”

Me: “Yes, sir. Did someone just call me about you?”

Caller, to people in his office: “Did somebody just call about me?”

Caller, to me: “Yes.”

Me: “Alright, sir, in order to determine your username and password, you’ll need to be in front of a computer. Are you at a computer now?”

Caller, to people in his office: “Am I at a computer?”

It’s Gonna Be A Long Call, Part 4
It’s Gonna Be A Long Call, Part 3
It’s Gonna Be A Long Call, Part 2
It’s Gonna Be A Long Call

Conjured Coffee Conjugations

| Wexford, Ireland | Uncategorized

Me: “Excuse me, madam. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Thanks, I’ll have a ‘MochaChinaFrappaLatte’ please.”

Me: “Sorry, madam, but those are each separate coffees. Mocha, cappuccino, frappe and a latte?”

Customer: “Oh. I just heard it on TV and I thought it sounded cool…”

Identity TV Determined

| Wasaga Beach, ON, Canada | Uncategorized

Customer: “Are you on the show [T.V. show]?”

Me: “Pardon me?”

Customer: “You know the show [T.V. show]? Are you on it? Cause you really look like a character on it.”

Me: “No, I am sorry I am not.”

Customer: “Are you lying to me? I am pretty sure you are that girl from [T.V. show]!”

Me: “No, I work at [coffee shop], not on a television show.”

(This went on until my manager had to step in.)

Manager: *sarcastically* “Yes she is on [T.V. show], she just likes to fly hundreds of kilometers back to Wasaga to work at [coffee shop] because she needs extra money.”

Customer: “I knew it!”

(Later on, she brought her boyfriend back and tried to convince me to give her an autograph.)

It’s Late When It’s Son-Down

| Spokane, WA, USA | Uncategorized

(A woman and her pre-teen son approach the counter.)

Son: “I want both of these movies!”

Mother: “We will have to see. I don’t have a lot of cash and we might have late fees.”

Son: “God! Mom you are so dumb! I can’t believe you forgot to take back the d*** movies!”

Me, to mother: “If your late fees are too much, we will also accept your first born in payment.”

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