Featured Story:
  • Bigotry Is Not On The Menu
    (1,939 thumbs up)
  • The Twilight Of Our Literacy, Part 3

    | Bridgeport, OR, USA | Books & Reading, Geeks Rule, Top

    Customer: “Hello, do you have any of the new Twilight books?”

    Me: “Yes, they’re over here.”

    (I lead her to where they would be, but we appear to be sold out. This is strange as all copies were put up this morning.)

    Me: “That’s strange. We seem to be out of stock. Can I interest you in anything else?”

    Customer: “Ugh, fine. What about this one?”

    (They point towards ‘Harry Potter’.)

    Me: “Oh, that’s a great book! It’s about a boy who becomes a wizard and-”

    Customer: “Are there any werewolves?”

    Me: “I think so. I haven’t read them in a while.”

    (The customer grabs the entire series of ‘Harry Potter’ and leaves. As I’m about to return to my workstation, two teens run up to me, high-five each other, and tell me they hid all 70 copies of ‘Twilight’ in the ceiling when no one was looking. Although impressed, I have to report them to my manager. After doing so, my manager gives them each a $10 gift card.)

    Related:
    The Twilight Of Our Literacy, Part 2
    The Twilight Of Our Literacy

    Life Is Stranger Than Non-Fiction

    | Virginia Beach, VA, USA | Uncategorized

    (A customer approaches the information desk at a large chain bookstore.)

    Me: “Hi. How can I help you?”

    Customer: “I’m looking for the non-fiction section.”

    Me: “Could you be more specific?”

    Customer: “The non-fiction section.”

    Me: “Well, the non fiction section includes computers, travel, art, poetry, religion, health, biographies, beauty and many other topics. It’s 60% of the store. Is there one area of non-fiction you are looking for?”

    (The customer begins to walk in a circle.)

    Customer: “I think I will just look around.”

    Related:
    Life Is Stranger Than Fiction, Part 2
    Life Is Stranger Than Fiction

    A Mother’s Love Is Priceless, For Everything Else There’s Credit Cards

    | Dayton, OH, USA | Top

    (A little girl walks up to me and my coworker. She is crying.)

    Me: “Oh, honey. What’s wrong?”

    Girl: “I can’t find my mom.”

    Me: “Well, I can page over the speaker for her. What’s her name?”

    (She gives me the name. My coworker gets a description of her mother as I page. When it’s a lost child, all we say is ‘We have something of yours’ for safety reasons. This is to make sure the child does go with their actual parent.)

    Girl: “I think she left.”

    Coworker: “No, she didn’t. She’s probably looking for you.”

    Girl: “She said she was going to leave me if I didn’t keep up.”

    Me: “She didn’t mean it. Don’t worry, she’ll be here.”

    (We get the girl to talk about her school and dog to keep her mind off how scared she is. It is the longest we have waited for a parent to come. Her mother finally gets there, and stops as soon as she sees her daughter.)

    Mother: “Oh, you! I thought I lost my credit card. Well, come on already! You’ve slowed me down enough.”

    (The girl quietly walks over to her mother.)

    Mother, to me: “Next time, just say it’s my daughter so I know not to rush!”

    About To Be A War Of The Roses

    | Columbia, MO, USA | Top

    (The customer is purchasing a large bouquet of flowers.)

    Me: “Wow! That’s a big arrangement. Is it a birthday, anniversary or apology?”

    Customer: “I slept with my girlfriend’s sister last night.”

    Me: “I’m going make you up something bigger with more roses. There’s a gourmet chocolate shop down the road.”

    Customer: “Thanks.”

    H2-No

    | MI, USA | Uncategorized

    (A couple and their son of about 7 or 8 years old sit down at a table. I start pouring each of them some water.)

    Boy: “What’s that stuff?”

    Mother: “Water, sweetie.”

    (The boy looks at his glass curiously. He sticks his finger in it for a second, then sinks back into his seat.)

    Boy: “Hmm…”

    Page 1,669/2,598First...1,6671,6681,6691,6701,671...Last