Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Marriage Of The Undead
    (1,875 thumbs up)
  • November Theme Of The Month: I Don't Work Here!
    Submit your story today!

    Bagging A Deal

    , | Vancouver, Canada |

    Me: “Hello. Just so you know you with your purchase you can get any of these movies for $5.99, you save–”

    Customer: “No! You know what? I am sick and tired of you people offering me things. I can’t come to the d*** mall without getting offered a deal. If I want something I will tell you, and you will give it to me. Understand?”

    Me: “I’m sorry. Here’s your purchase.”

    Customer: “Aren’t you going to offer me a bag?”

    Some Years Are More Golden Than Others

    | New Mexico, USA |

    (Note: I work at a restaurant where I have to wear an extremely conservative uniform with minimal makeup and jewelry. I’m serving two elderly ladies.)

    Me: “Hey guys, how are y’all doing today? What can I get for you to drink?”

    Customer #1: “Coffee.”

    Customer #2: “Me too, please.”

    Me: “Okay, I’ll have that right out for you.”

    Customer #1 to #2: “Doesn’t she look like a gold digger?”

    Customer #2: “I was thinking the same thing!” *to me* “Honey, are you a gold digger?”

    Me: “Um, no, ma’am. I am just a waitress.”

    Customer #1: “Well, come on now dear. It’s obvious that you’re a gold digger.”

    Customer #2: “It’s nothing to be ashamed of! Be proud! In all my years of living, I’ve learned it’s the best thing to do–be a gold digger!”

    Me: “What?”

    Customer #2: “It’s okay to be a gold digger, honey. I’m sure you’re a very good one! You look like you’d be great at it.”

    Customer #1: “Yes! Well, I’m glad we know that you’re a gold digger now. I’m proud of you. I’d like cream with my coffee.”

    Me: “O…Okay, I’ll have that right out…”

    When Free Advice Gets Expensive

    | Vernon, BC, Canada | Top

    (A customer approaches me with a new Blu-ray movie.)

    Me: “Ah. Blu-ray is a great choice, it looks amazing.”

    Customer: “Great! I’m so excited to watch my first Blu-ray. We just setup the PVR this morning.”

    Me: “PVR?”

    Customer: “Yeah our PVR machine to watch Blu-rays.”

    Me: “I’m hate to say this, but PVR’s don’t play Blu-rays. They record live television.”

    Customer: *rolls eyes* “Yes, but they play Blu-rays as well!”

    Me: “I am sorry, but they don’t. If you buy this, open up the movie and then figure out that your machine won’t play it then I can’t give you a refund. I can’t do refunds on new products that are opened.”

    Customer: “Don’t treat me like I’m an idiot, and don’t threaten me! I know this plays Blu-rays! My friend Steve told it does, and he used to work for a major retailer.”

    Me: “Okay, I will. Just to ask, where is the disc tray on your PVR?”

    Customer: *thinks* “You know, on second thought, Steve also got fired for fraud.”

    Flipping Out

    | Georgia, USA | Technology, Top

    Me: “Thank you for calling [cable company]. How may I help you?”

    Caller: “We just moved my grandmother’s TV and I think the cable has been disconnected at the outlet where we moved it. Could you send someone to reconnect it?”

    (Suddenly, the grandmother grabs the phone.)

    Caller’s grandmother: *yelling* “That is not what happened! The cable has been hooked to that outlet since the 70’s! You people just need to flip the little switch and turn it back on!”

    (The grandson gets back on the phone.)

    Caller: “I am so sorry. Please ignore her. I just need to set up an appointment for the technician to come out.”

    Me: “No problem. My grandmother can be like that too. I can have someone out on Tuesday.”

    Caller’s grandmother: *yelling in the background* “You are not listening! All they have to do is flip the switch! Don’t let them lie to you!”

    Caller: “Grams, when you moved the TV back in the ’80′s you had the cable disconnected from this outlet and reconnected at the other end.”

    Caller’s grandmother: “Now you’re lying! I’m going to make sure that I’m not here when they come out. This is ridiculous! Tell them not to come!”

    Me: “Tell her that our switch is broken here and we have to manually come out and flip it in her home. We’ll be there Tuesday.”

    (The grandson relays this information.)

    Caller’s grandmother: “Oh, okay then. I’ll see them Tuesday.”

    Caller, to me: “Bless you.”

    So She Thinks She Can Dance

    | Washington, USA |

    (A little old lady approaches me and a new employee while we’re standing in the movie theater lobby.)

    Customer: *dances*

    Me: “That’s nice, ma’am.”

    Customer: *continues dancing*

    Me: “Um…I don’t know how to respond to that.”

    Customer: *continues dancing*

    Me: “I’m sorry, I really don’t know how to respond.”

    Customer: “You could say ‘You’re a great dancer!’” *walks toward the
    concession stand*

    New guy: “Does that happen often?”

    Me: “No. Believe it or not, that’s actually a new one.”

    Page 1,656/2,193First...1,6541,6551,6561,6571,658...Last