Trick And/Or Treat

| Westminster, CO, USA | Family & Kids

(It’s getting close to Halloween. I’m doing my daily duties when I hear a woman talking to her son.)

Son: “Mom, can we get these candies for Halloween?”

Woman: “No! For the last time, we are not getting candy!”

Son: “Why not?!”

Woman: “I’m a teacher. Our house will get TP’d whether we have candy or not!”

Look, But Don’t Touch Or Read

| Massachusetts, USA | Books & Reading

(A middle-aged man and woman walk into the small used bookshop. They look around at the shelvesof books, seemingly perplexed. After giving them a bit of time time, I check up on them.)

Me: “Hi! Let me know if I can help you with anything.”

Woman: What kind of place is this?

Me: *confused* “I’m sorry?”

Man: “What is this place?”

Me: *still confused* “It’s a bookstore.”

Woman: “So, all these books are are for sale?”

Me: “Yes they are!”

Man: “Oh…”

(They exchange looks and leave.)

How Berry Rude Of You

| Raleigh, NC, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink

(I’m straightening things in the store and I have just finished an aisle. As I walk into the next aisle, which contains candles, I see a customer looking at the candles. He looks very angry and makes a strange face when he sees me walking towards him.)

Me: “Hi, how may I help you?”

Customer: “You don’t have mulberry. That’s rude!”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “You should be!” *stomps out of the aisle*

They Sneak Up On Ya

| Prince Rupert, BC, Canada | Tourists/Travel

Customer: “Hey, are there any Indian attacks on this village?”

Me: *taken aback* “Um. No. No, there are not.”

Customer: “Well, what about the sign?”

Me: “What sign?”

Customer: “The sign that says ‘Watch Out For Ava-LAN-cheez’.”

(From his pronunciation, it’s clear what he’s actually referring to are Apaches, not avalanches.)

Me: *trying not to laugh* “Um, no…they never attack our small village anymore.”

Stupidity Is The Mother Of Repetition, Part 5

| Jackson, WY, USA | Food & Drink

Me: “All of today’s specials and all of the sandwiches on the menu come with your choice of soup or salad or potato salad. What can I get for you today, sir?”

Customer: “You say that the sandwiches come with salad?”

Me: “That’s correct. So do all of the specials. You can get soup, salad, or potato salad.”

Customer: *pointing to the sandwich side of the menu* “So, all of these come with salad?”

Me: “Yup, or soup or potato salad. All of ’em.”

Customer: “What about this option?” *pointing to a particular sandwich* “Does this come with salad?”

Me: “Yes, sir, that one too. You can also choose soup or potato salad.”

Customer: “I’ll have that one, then.”

Me: “Okay, what would you like as your side?”

Customer: “What are my choices?”

Me: *speechless*

Related:
Stupidity Is The Mother Of Repetition, Part 4
Stupidity Is The Mother Of Repetition, Part 3
Stupidity Is The Mother Of Repetition, Part 2
Stupidity Is The Mother Of Repetition

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