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    Not Remotely Intelligent, Part 6

    , | Romania |

    (A customer comes in asking about a monitor. She needs convincing that it is brand new, and that we do not sell second hand.)

    Customer: “Where do I adjust the brightness and contrast ?”

    Me: “From the menu, like in a TV.”

    (I bring up the menu on the screen to show her.)

    Customer: “So, is that included in the price?”

    Me: “Pardon?”

    Customer: “The menu.”

    Me: “Yes. The menu comes with the price.”

    Related:
    Not Remotely Intelligent, Part 5
    Not Remotely Intelligent, Part 4
    Not Remotely Intelligent, Part 3

    Living In Their Own Little Bubble

    | Mansfield, TX, USA |

    Me: “Front desk, this is [me].”

    Guest: “Is this the front desk?”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am. What can I do for you?”

    Guest: “Is it okay to get in the hot tub?”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am. It is open 24 hours.”

    Guest: “Okay. I was just checking because there seem to be bubbles in it.”

    Me: “No, that’s normal.”

    Guest: “I’ll call you if it’s a problem.” *click*

    Someone Has Baggage

    | Valdosta, GA, USA |

    (The cashier calls me up to the register to check a price for a product that’s ringing up as more than the shelf tag indicated. I run to check, and report back.)

    Me: “Yes, sir. I’m sorry, it appears the sale sign was still up. But our system no longer recognizes the sale price. We’ll change the price for you.”

    Customer: “Have you ever had a bag placed over your head?”

    Me: “Um…no.”

    Customer: “Well, you’re fixing the price for me. So today’s not that day.”

    Not Quite At The Top Of Their Game

    | Culver City, CA, USA |

    Customer: “I would like to buy [game].”

    (I note that the game is offered on multiple platforms.)

    Me: “Okay. Would you like it for the computer?”

    Customer: “No…I’d like it for my kids.”

    I Do Work Here, Does Not Work Here

    | NJ, USA |

    Customer: “Do you work here?”

    Me: “Yes.”

    Customer: “Can you help me?”

    Me: “Of course!”

    Customer: “Come with me.”

    (The customer proceeds to take me to the office and speaks to my manager.)

    Customer: “Does he work here?”

    Manager: “Yes.”

    Customer: “Can he help me?”

    Manager: “Yes.”

    Customer: “Okay. I just wanted to make sure he wasn’t lying to me.”

    Related:
    I Don’t Work Here Does Not Work Here, Part 3
    I Don’t Work Here Does Not Work Here, Part 2
    I Don’t Work Here Does Not Work Here

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