November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

The Customer Spent Money But The Child Is Complimentary

| Chicago, IL, USA | Awesome Customers, Family & Kids

(I work at a big box store in the jewellery department. I am usually the only one there during the mornings. I am also seven months pregnant. I am helping a lady pick out a new watch, with her younger old daughter sitting in the cart. This happens just as the lady is about to pay for her item.)

Me: “And here’s your change. Thank you for shopping with us!”

Lady: “Thank you. Good luck with the future baby!”

Me: “Thanks!”

Little Girl: “I bet the baby will be pretty because you are pretty like a princess!”

Me: “Aww, thanks!”

(I couldn’t stop smiling after they left. Little girl made my week! And my baby was the prettiest baby in the hospital when she was born – nurses even thought so!)

Bright Red For Other Reasons

| Glasgow, Scotland, UK | Crazy Requests, Health & Body, Top

Customer: “Helloooo! I’m at the desk!”

Me: “Oh, sorry, you just walked in. I was just coming to see to you !”

Customer: *demanding tone* “I’m wanting go bright red, okay?!”

Me: “Well, I will take you over first, then we can have a proper consultation.”

Customer: “Right then!”

Me: “If you are wanting to go bright red, we would need to strip the colour out because you are jet black.”

Customer: “Well, I don’t want that; it hurts when it gets stripped! I want bright red now, from the poster! I’m the customer; I’m always right!”

Me: “Well, I have been doing hairdressing for two years, and to be honest, it doesn’t hurt because it won’t be on your scalp.”

Customer: “Well, I’m still right. If you put the red on, it will work!”

Me: “Okay, then.”

(After I apply the color to keep her happy…)

Customer: “Where is my f***ing bright red hair?!”

Me: “I told you it wouldn’t work. As you said, you’re the customer, and you’re always right!”

(She ended up keeping her mouth shut. Thankfully, she didn’t come back again!)

Pen Her In For A Discount

| MI, USA | Awesome Customers, Bizarre, Top

(I am a cashier at a small chain grocery store in a small town. I am monitoring the self-checkout station when a customer walks up to me.)

Me: “Is there something I can help you with?”

Customer: “Hi is [coworker’s name] still here?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but he has already left for the evening. Is there something I could assist you with?”

Customer: “Well, I am so embarrassed. He was my cashier earlier today and he asked me if I gave his pen back to him. I checked my pockets and I thought I did, but when I got home I found it in my purse! Could I leave this with you and you give it to him next time he comes in?”

Me: *slightly shocked* “Ma’am, you mean to tell me you drove all the way back here to return a pen to my coworker?”

Customer: “Yes. I told him I hadn’t took it. I feel so bad!”

Me: “Well that is very kind of you, I am sure he will appreciate it. I will make sure to leave him a note letting him know you returned it. Might I ask how far you had to drive to return it?”

Customer: “Well, I live in [town about 40 minutes away from store location].”


Twist And Shout

| Ireland | Extra Stupid

(I work for a well known camera brand in their technical and customer support department. A customer calls in with quite an angry tone.)

Customer: “I have bought a lens for my camera and the lens cap is stuck on it and won’t come off. This is the second lens of this kind I have had. I had to get the first one replaced for the same issue. There is clearly a fault with this lens.”

Me: “I am very sorry to hear of your issue, sir. Can I ask what lens it is you have and where you bought it from?”

Customer: “It is a [lens model], and I bought it from [store]’s online store.”

Me: “Thank you. Can you please explain in what way you are having difficulty in getting the lens cap off?”

(I ask this because the lens cap normally just twists off, and it would be very unlikely for it to be stuck on purchasing the lens.)

Customer: “What a stupid question! I am turning it like on all my other lens. They’re supposed to twist off!”

Me: “Have you tried turning it the other way sir?”

Customer: “Oh!”

(There’s a long pause while the customer fiddles with their camera.)

Customer: “…Well, it should be clearer.” *click*

On The Straight And Narrow (Minded), Part 3

| TN, USA | Awesome Workers, Bigotry, Love/Romance, Top

(My uncle is gay, but isn’t flamboyant. He works as a service advisor at a car dealership. He is scheduling an appointment for an elderly customer.)

Uncle: “All right. So, if you come in next week we can fix your car. However, I am going to be on vacation next week, so you’ll need to see [other service advisor].

Customer: “Ah, that’s all right. Where are you heading to?”

Uncle: “I’m going to Cape Cod.”

Customer: “Well, be careful up there.”

Uncle: “Why?”

Customer: “Cause up there’s Queersville.”

Uncle: “Uh… excuse me?!”

Customer: “Queersville; it’s full of f**s!”

Uncle: *calmly* “Thank you for warning me. I’ll be sure to tell my boyfriend, cause he sure hates f**s!”

Customer: *turns pales and leaves*

On The Straight And Narrow (Minded), Part