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    Shaken, Not Stirred

    | Oklahoma City, OK, USA |

    (Okahoma has been getting a few earthquakes lately and apparently not everyone is used to them yet.)

    Me: “911, where is your emergency?”

    Caller: “Yeah, um, I’d like to report that my house just shook.”

    Me: “Yes, sir, that was an earthquake. Is anyone injured?”

    Caller: “Oh! Is THAT what that was? Nevermind!”

    Don’t Tell The Methodists

    | Texas, USA | Religion, Top

    Customer: “I’d like 50 Christmas stamps, please.”

    Me: “What denomination?”

    Customer: *befuddled* “Oh, my, has it come to this? Um, give me 22 Catholic, 12 Presbyterian, 10 Lutheran and 6 of the Baptists.”

    Congratulations, HawaiiEast!

    | Twitter |

    iPod Touch Tweet & Follow GiveawayThanks to all who joined the Not Always Right iPod Touch Contest! The giveaway is now over, and a winner has been chosen.

    Congratulations, @HawaiiEast! He will receive an 8GB iPod Touch in his choice of black or white.

    Didn’t win this time? Not a problem, as you’ll have more opportunities to win in the future. Be sure to follow us on Twitter or like us on Facebook to find out about future contests!

    - The Not Always Right Team

    Mavis Beacon’s Cousin Or Something

    | New York, NY, USA | Books & Reading

    Customer: “I’m looking for this foreign language program my friend has, but I can’t remember the name of it.”

    Me: “Okay, well, was it a book or was it for the computer?”

    Customer: “It goes on the computer. I think it was called…Susan?”

    Me: “Susan? I can’t say I’ve heard of it.”

    Customer: “Oh, I’m sure you have. It’s very famous! I just can’t remember her last name. It’s her first and last name. Can you look it up?”

    (I bring her to the computer and try to pull up the name of the program, but the computer can’t find anything.)

    Customer: “Maybe it’s not Susan. It’s definitely a woman’s name, though.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, I can’t find it. Let me show you where all the computer programs like that are, though. Maybe it’ll jog your memory.”

    (I walk her over educational computer program area.)

    Customer: “Oh, I see it! Rosetta Stone! I knew it was a woman’s name.”

    Saving For Savings

    | Charlotte, NC, USA |

    (A customer approaches me as I am trying leave the store after my shift.)

    Customer: “Excuse me, my son has saved over one thousand, two hundred dollars at this store. What does he get?”

    Me: “I’m sorry?”

    Customer: “Don’t you have some kind of rewards program for someone who’s saved that much?”

    Me: “In the past, we’ve done some giveaways, but at the moment, I’m afraid we’re not running any long-term programs like that.”

    Customer: *annoyed* “So he’s saved over twelve hundred dollars here and he doesn’t get anything?”

    Me: “Well, there’s that twelve hundred dollars…”

    (There’s a silence as she just stares at me.)

    Customer: “You should really take better care of your customers.” *walks away*

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