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    P.O.’d: When So-So, Not O.K. To K.O.

    | Colorado Springs, CO, USA |

    (I work customer service for a cable company. A major live pay-per-view fighting event has just ended.)

    Me: “Thanks for calling [cable provider]. How may I help you?”

    Customer: “I want a refund on the fight.”

    Me: “Sorry to hear that. What happened with it?”

    Customer: “I was jipped. I didn’t get my money’s worth.”

    Me: “I’m sorry you feel that way. Did you have issues with the picture?”

    (We are aware that some areas had some picture breakup and other problems at the beginning of the fight. We therefore can offer partial credit if it’s justified.)

    Customer: “Oh, it was a wonderful picture, nice and clear.”

    Me: “May I ask then, what made you feel ‘jipped’?”

    Customer: “I ordered it to see the main event and it ended in only 3 rounds! Not nearly worth the $64.99 I paid for it, so I want my money refunded!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I cannot offer credit just because you were dissatisfied with the content of an event. [Cable company] is not responsible for the content; we are only the conduit to deliver the event to the customer. Since you say we delivered the event to your TV flawlessly, this issue is not creditable.”

    Customer: “Well, I’m only gonna pay $30 for it.”

    Me: “You can pay $30, but the fight will still be charged to you at full price. I cannot credit the event because your dissatisfaction with its duration is in no way [cable company]‘s fault or responsibility. I’m sorry, sir.”

    Customer: “Well, that’s a load of bull****! You have a contract for that event. Just tell them to get back up and fight some more!”