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    One Foot In The Grave, One Hand On The Printing Press

    | Corpus Christi, TX, USA |

    Me: *on the phone* “**** Newspaper, can I help you?”

    Caller: “Hi, is this the obituaries?”

    Me: “Yes ma’am, it is.”

    Caller: “I need to place one.”

    Me: “OK ma’am. You can send that to me via fax or email.”

    Caller: “What do they typically say?”

    Me: “They vary, but some good information is where the individual was born, when they passed away–”

    Caller: “Oh, he’s not dead yet.”

    Me: “I–I’m sorry?”

    Caller: “He’s very sick, though. Should be any day.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but we can’t run an obituary until the individual has died.”

    Caller: *sighs heavily* “Well that’s VERY inconvenient.” *hangs up*