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    Not-So-Great Expectations

    | Okemos, MI, USA |

    (It was Memorial Day, and my restaurant happened to be open, although business was very slow. I then received a phone call.)

    Me: “Thank you for calling ****, how can I help you?”

    Caller: “Yes, can you tell me if **** restaurant is open today? *naming a competitor*

    Me: “Uh, I really don’t know if they’re open. You know you called ****, right?”

    Caller: “Of course I do, I just assumed you would know if they were open.”

    Me: “Ma’am, we’re not affiliated with them. We really don’t keep track of what other restaurants in the area do with regard to their business hours.”

    Caller: “You’re not being very helpful. I think there should be something you should be able to do.”

    Me: “Have you tried calling them?”

    Caller: “Of course I’ve tried calling them. I’m not an idiot.”

    Me: “What did they say when they answered?”

    Caller: “No one picked up. I called four different times, and no one answered.”

    Me: “Well, that probably means that they’re closed today. If no one is working there, I mean.”

    Caller: “I just want to make sure – can you send someone over there to check?”

    Me: “Um, no, we can’t.”

    Caller: “Why not?”

    Me: “Because we work here. I can’t send an employee out of the restaurant to drive down the road and find out if a competitor is open today. If you really want to find out, I suggest you drive there yourself.”

    Caller: “I’m not going to waste my time and drive to a restaurant where no one answered the phone! My time is valuable.”

    Me: *losing patience* “Clearly.”

    Caller: “Look, I don’t see why this is so difficult. Just send someone down there to see if they’re open. It’s not like you’re working today.”

    Me: “Actually, we are working. Our restaurant is open today.”

    Caller: “Oh, do you have any specials?”

    Me: “…”