Socially Unacceptable

(My boyfriend and I are out to dinner. He’s telling me a story about a call he went on while he was working as an EMT, earlier in the day.)

Boyfriend: “I went on a call for a little old man. He seemed really excited to see us and really chatted us up while we were there. His wife died a couple years ago and he seemed totally lost and lonely without her, like he didn’t know what to do. She was his whole life.”

(I think this is sad but sweet and expect my boyfriend to go into a ‘You’re my whole life’ speech. Instead…)

Boyfriend: “…that’s why I want us to have full social lives outside of each other when we’re married. You know, friends and hobbies and stuff. If you die first, I don’t want to be lost and lonely all the time.”

Me: *shocked* “Well, I hope you’d be too devastated to worry about your social life.”

Boyfriend: *covering* “Oh, of course! But, you know, after a couple years, I wouldn’t still want to be at my house alone all the time.” *realizing he’s not winning any points* “Well, I’d hope the same thing for you! If I died first I wouldn’t want you to be bored all the time.”

(I couldn’t get him to understand why I didn’t think that was a romantic sentiment! This past year I married the love of my life — which was not him. My husband has assured me he’d be totally and utterly devastated if I died and would not be concerned about his social life. He still randomly brings this story up in disbelief and gets mad at my ex for me!)