No Substitute For Sarcasm

(I’m a substitute teacher for a relatively small district and one of few willing to work in the middle school. As a result, I’m there nearly every day and the students all know me. On this day, I’m assigned to a seventh grade social studies class and the first period students are starting to arrive.)

Student: *entering the classroom with her friend and seeing me at the teacher’s desk* “Hey, Miss [My Name]! Are you our sub today?”

Me: “No, [Student]. I missed you so much I got up at the crack of dawn just to come say hi.”

Student: “Really? They let you do that?”

(The class starts laughing and the student looks confused.)

Student’s Friend: “No, you idiot. That’s what’s called sarcasm.”