Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • This Round He Lost (In Translation), Part 4
    (2,061 thumbs up)
  • April Themed Story Giveaway: Creepy Customers!
    Submit your story today!

    No Helium For The Airhead

    | Belgium |

    (A customer addresses me with a question about balloons we’ve sold her the week before.)

    Customer: “I think I bought the wrong ones.” *points at the shelf* “These don’t rise to the ceiling. Where are the ones that do?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but there is only one kind of balloon. They float if you fill them with helium.”

    (The customer stands there giving me a puzzled look.)

    Me: “You just blew them up with air, didn’t you? You see, if the gas is lighter than the air–”

    (She continues to look with a confused, helpless gaze.)

    Me: “If you want them to float in the air, you’ll just have to buy this tank of helium, put the balloon over the valve and release the gas into the balloon.”

    Customer: “But I’ve already blown up all the balloons! Is there no other way to have them go up to the ceiling?”

    Me: “You could tape them onto your ceiling.”