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    Must Be From Orange County

    | Catalina Island, CA | Top

    Me: “How can I help you today?”

    Customer: “What time does the island close?”

    Me: “Close? It doesn’t close. It isn’t like Disneyland, sir. People live here.”

    Customer: “Don’t lie to me. I’ve been walking around, and those houses are too small for anyone to live in.”

    Me: “Sir, I live in one of those houses.”

    Customer’s wife: “No, honey, she can’t break character.” *winks at me* “I get it.”

    Customer: “But really, when do you close?”

    Me: “I’m not ‘in character.’ This is an actual town, with actual people living in it. It doesn’t close.”

    Customer’s wife: “Don’t treat us like we’re children, just tell us when.”

    Me: *sigh* “5 o’clock, ma’am. Have a nice day.”