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Miss Impossible

Supermarket | New Jersey, USA

(Two days before Thanksgiving, people are picking up their orders of turkeys. One customer placed an order late, for a 20 lb. fresh Butterball. We didn’t get many of those, so I reserved a 20 lb. fresh “other” turkey.)

Me: “Well, I do have a previously frozen Butterball that a customer changed their mind on. It’s pretty much thawed out, you could have that.”

Customer: “No, my mother won’t eat frozen turkey.”

Me: “Well, then take the fresh one.”

Customer: “My mother only eats Butterball.”

Me: “This is a Butterball, and since you have to thaw it anyway to cook it, why not take the Butterball?”

Customer: “She won’t eat frozen turkeys.”
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Me: “We still have small fresh Butterballs, why not take two of them?”

Customer: “No, my mother is making a turkey too, and I don’t want to have three of them.”

Me: *exasperated*

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