Microbrain

(I am serving several customers at once while my colleague does other chores around the store. The latest customer brings a tub of soup to the counter to be warmed up.)

Me: *to my colleague* “Can you put this on for me while I serve these customers?”

Colleague: “No.”

Me: “Sorry?”

Colleague: “No, I can’t use the microwave.”

Me: “Oh, it’s very simple. You just need to—”

Colleague: “No, I won’t use the microwave. I’ll get cancer.”

Me: “No, you won’t.”

Colleague: “Yes, I will! Trust me; I know.”

(My husband works as a radiation safety officer at the local hospital. I told him this later. He laughed.)

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