(It’s Valentine’s Day, and my mom is getting a new cell phone. Except for the salesman, my mother, and me, the store is empty. We are making small talk as he is setting it up.)

Salesman: “…yeah, my neighbor’s been really mad at me lately. It’s weird.”

(Suddenly, a lady bursts into the store, COMPLETELY decked out in Valentine’s Day wear. She even had those little heart antennae things that little kids wear.)

Valentine’s lady: “I just saw your commercial on TV, and my daughter’s phone is all messed up! It’s your fault! My daughter’s phone is all messed up and now she can’t call! Your commercial is misleading! You have TERRIBLE MARKETING!”

(Without another word, she storms out.)

Me: “Was that your neighbor?”

Salesman: “I have no idea who that was…”