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    Lord Of The Rain Dance

    | United Kingdom |

    Me: “Good afternoon, [theatre], how can I help you?”

    Caller: “Yes, I want to know what’s happening tonight with the show, since it’s going to rain. I have tickets and I want a refund.”

    Me: “Well, the company doesn’t cancel a show until the scheduled start time, so you do have to turn up at the venue to see what we’re doing. We will go ahead in light rain, and we can’t refund if the show goes ahead.”

    Caller: “You’re telling me I have to drive all the way there, when you know it’s going to be canceled?”

    Me: “Well, we don’t decide until that time because we’re not sure what the weather will be like this evening.”

    Caller: “The national weather service says it’s going to rain.”

    Me: “Well, ma’am, the weather’s been a bit unpredictable lately, so–”

    Caller: “That’s not true.”

    Me: “I’m sorry?”

    Caller: “They said it would rain tonight.”

    Me: “Of course, ma’am, but we’re still not sure that at the time of the show–”

    Caller: “You shouldn’t insult people like that. People have studied for years to be able to predict the weather! You shouldn’t just dismiss that!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I didn’t mean to-”

    Caller: “Oh, I’m sure you didn’t, but you really should be more careful how you speak. If they say there’s going to a storm, you should respect that. You should cancel your show.”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am. Well unfortunately, that is the visiting company’s policy, so I’m afraid you’ll have to take it up with them.”

    Caller: “I will!” *hangs up*

    (Unfortunately for the caller, we had beautiful summer evening and the show went ahead as planned.)