(We have kiosks in our location that provide a number of services. We also have an online service that provides some different options than we are able to provide in the store. A woman in her 30s is on the kiosk closest to me trying to order something that we don’t do in the store.)

Me: “How can I help you?”

Customer: “I’m trying to order [product], but I can’t find it on this kiosk.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but that item is only available online.”

Customer: “What’s that?”

Me: “It’s only available through the computer.”

Customer: *blank look*

Me: “You have to go onto a computer and go to the website to order that item, because it’s not available to order in the store.”

Customer: “What computer?”

Me: “You have to get onto the internet and order that product from our website.”

Customer: “I don’t understand what you’re saying! What’s a website?”

Me: *speechless*

Related:
Log On To The Clueless Wide Web, Part 2
Log On To The Clueless Wide Web