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    Lindsay Lohan Is Bad For Your Health

    | NJ, USA |

    (A customer approaches the counter with a very thick accent.)

    Customer: “Do you have the herpes?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, what?”

    Customer: “Do you have the herpes? For the kids?”

    Me: “I… uh…”

    Customer: “You know? The herpes? Beep beep? Lindsay Lohan?”

    Me: “Oh! Yes! We have Herbie Fully Loaded with Lindsay Lohan. It’s rented out. Can I call you when it’s returned?”

    Customer: “You call me when you have the Herpes, yes!”

    (The movie is eventually returned. I call the customer to let him know. His wife answers.)

    Me: “Hi, this is . The movie you reserved was just returned.”

    Caller: “Oh! The Herpes! I send my husband. The kids so happy!”