(A customer approaches the counter with a very thick accent.)

Customer: “Do you have the herpes?”

Me: “I’m sorry, what?”

Customer: “Do you have the herpes? For the kids?”

Me: “I… uh…”

Customer: “You know? The herpes? Beep beep? Lindsay Lohan?”

Me: “Oh! Yes! We have Herbie Fully Loaded with Lindsay Lohan. It’s rented out. Can I call you when it’s returned?”

Customer: “You call me when you have the Herpes, yes!”

(The movie is eventually returned. I call the customer to let him know. His wife answers.)

Me: “Hi, this is [video store]. The movie you reserved was just returned.”

Caller: “Oh! The Herpes! I send my husband. The kids so happy!”