So Mean It Takes Your Breath Away

(At my middle school, we have a nurse who seems to hate everyone and everything. She is one of the meanest, angriest people I know. One day my friend has an asthma attack and goes to her. She can barely get the words out because she’s wheezing.)

Friend: “Help me! I can’t work my inhaler; it’s jammed!”

Nurse: *glaring* “You should know how to work your own inhaler. Do it yourself.”

Friend: “I do know how to work it, but it’s jammed! Help me!”

Nurse: *still glaring* “No. It’s not my job to help you kids with equipment you should be able to work on your own. Do it yourself!”

Friend: “…please…” *gasp* “…I can’t… breathe, you have extra…” *gasp* “…meds in the back…”

Nurse: “The extra albuterol? I’m not giving that to you. That’s for people who really need it. Your inhaler is right there.”

Friend: *turning purple* “But… it’s… ” *gasp* “…jammed…” wheeze* “…I… can’t fix it… please…”

Nurse: “No! You use your own inhaler and you do it now. I’m not giving you more meds.”

(My friend passes out on the floor. They have to call an ambulance. The paramedics question my friend.)

Medic #1: “Why didn’t you use your inhaler?”

Friend: “It was jammed! I couldn’t get it to work.”

Medic #2: “Okay, so why didn’t you ask that nurse to fix it?”

Friend: “I did! She wouldn’t; she said she wasn’t helping me.”

Medic #1: “Didn’t she have extra albuterol then? Why didn’t she give you some of that?”

Friend: “Because she said it was for people who needed it, and my inhaler was in my hand.”

Medic #2: “…but your inhaler was jammed, and you couldn’t use it. Let me get this straight… you asked her for help, she wouldn’t help you, then she wouldn’t give you any other medicine, and she let you pass out?”

Friend: “That about sums it up.”

Medic #2: “Glad I don’t work with that b****!”