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    Lack of Register Does Not Register, Part 2

    | Flemington, NJ, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Technology

    (I am a cashier at a retail store, keeping an eye on the self-checkout area. I am not supposed to ring up customers on the machines, only assist whenever there’s a problem. A woman comes up to me with a few items.)

    Customer: “Hi, you need to ring me up.”

    Me: “This is the self-checkout. The ladies over there would be happy to take you if you don’t want to use the machines.”

    Customer: “This is self-checkout?”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am.”

    Customer: “Oh, I hate these self-check things. Can’t you just ring me up at that register there?”

    (She points at a computer monitor, lying on the floor near the garbage cans, with a large crack easily visible across the screen. I think she’s joking but realize she’s serious.)

    Me: “Um. No, I can’t, sorry. If you don’t want to use the self-checkout, the cashiers right behind us can—”

    Customer: “Why can’t you ring me up at that register?!”

    Me: “Well, because that’s not a register, ma’am.”

    Customer: “You don’t call that thing over there a register?”

    Me: “Nope, I call that a broken computer monitor.”

    Customer: “What’s the difference?”

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    Lack of Register Does Not Register