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    Just Shut Up And Watch Your Movie

    | Northbrook, IL, USA |

    (A customer walks up to the movie theater concession stand.)

    Me: “Hello, how can I help you?”

    Customer: “Yes, I’d like a cinnamon pretzel, please.”

    Me: “We don’t have any of those prepared right now, so it will be about five minutes. Is that ok?”

    Customer, pointing to the display case of pretzels: “Why can’t I have one of those?”

    Me: “Oh, those are just for display. They’re covered in chemicals and have been there for ages.”

    Customer: “So they’re not real pretzels?”

    Me: “No, they’re real pretzels, just not really edible.”

    Customer: “Well, you shouldn’t have them out if people can’t get them.”

    Me: “We put the display case out so people can see what they’re like.”

    Customer: “I still don’t understand why you have fake pretzels out instead of real ones.”

    Me: “Look, even if you could eat those pretzels, look at the case; there’s no way to open it!”

    Customer: “Fine. It still seems stupid to have fake pretzels.”