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    | Portsmouth, UK |

    Me: “Hi, how can I help?”

    Call Center: “I want a new computer. My current one is Windows 95.”

    Me: “Well, the current version is Windows 7.”

    Call Center: “What about the modem? If I buy a new hard drive, would it make my computer have internet?”

    Me: “You would need to add a modem if you wanted to just plug the phone line into the computer. Most internet providers supply you with an external modem as part of their service.”

    Call Center: “Well, I have a external hard drive. Could I plug the internet into that?

    Me: “It doesn’t work that way. You need a computer to connect to the internet.”

    Call Center: “Can’t I just download the internet onto my external hard drive?”