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    Immersed In His Complaint

    | Hermitage, PA, USA | Top

    (I am ringing out a customer who is buying a pair of swimming trunks.)

    Me: “Thank you for your purchase, sir. As a reminder of the return policy, you have 90 days to return it with the receipt as long as the tags are still attached.”

    Customer: “That’s okay. I’m going to a beach party later so I need them.”

    Me: “Okay. Well, have a good time. Thanks again, and have a nice day.”

    (The next day, the customer returns with the swimming trunks. The tag is still on them, but mostly disintegrated from water. The trunks smell of chlorine.)

    Me: “Hi again! How can I help you today?”

    Customer: “I need to return these.”

    Me: “Oh, is there something wrong with them?”

    Customer: “No. I just don’t need them anymore.”

    Me: “Sir, I’m sorry but these can’t be returned.”

    Customer: “Well, why the h*** not!? Yesterday, you said they could be returned as long as the tags were still on them.”

    Me: “Yes, sir. But having the tag on them generally implies that they haven’t been worn.”

    Customer: “This is b***s***! I would like to see your manager immediately.”

    Me: “Absolutely, sir.”

    (The manager comes over.)

    Manager: “What seems to be the problem?”

    (The customer goes through the same story. He leaves in a rage, screaming that he’s going to give us bad reviews. The next day a survey report comes in. All sections are given one star out of five. The comment section reads, ‘Stupid clerk told me I could return my swimming trunks as long as the tags were still on them. I didn’t take the tags off when I wore it, but she wouldn’t return it, and accused me of wearing it. Like she knows what I did with it. Maybe I spilled water on the tags by mistake. She couldn’t know. Only I know I wore it–not that d*** clerk.’)