Me: “Hi, [pizza place].”

Customer: “Hi, it says you have a nine inch small pizza. How big is that?”

Me: “Nine inches, six slices.”

Customer: “But how big is it?”

Me: “The diameter of the pizza is approximately nine inches. There are six slices.”

Customer: “Like, ok, but you already told me that. How big is it?”

Me: “I’m not sure what other metric to use. The pie is slightly smaller across than a third of a meter.”

Customer: *brief pause* “Okay, what size is the medium?”

Me: “Twelve inches, six slices.”

Customer: *another brief pause* “The small has six too. So they’re the same size?!”