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    If You Can’t Bring The Pizza To The Mountain…

    | Denver, CO, USA |

    (Sometimes the customers that call are out of our delivery area. We have to find out which restaurant delivers to them.)

    Me: “What are your major cross streets?”

    Customer: “Federal and Quincy.”

    Me: “Okay. That could be one of two stores. Are you North or South of Quincy Avenue?”

    Customer: “I don’t know.”

    Me: “Alright. Can you face Quincy from where you are standing?”

    Customer: “Okay.”

    Me: “Are the mountains on your left or your right?”

    Customer: “The mountains are in the west.”

    Me: “Yeah. But are they to your left or right when facing Quincy?”

    Customer: “They are in the west.”

    Me: “The mountains are always in the west. If the mountains are to the east of you, you aren’t in Denver.”

    Customer: “No. The mountains turn with me.”

    Me: “Pardon me?”

    Customer: “The mountains are in the west.”

    Me: “Yeah, that would mean you’re in Denver. Now are they on your left or your right?”

    Customer: “I’m telling you, the mountains are in the west!”

    Me: “I’m not arguing the geography with you. I’m trying to find out where you are.”

    Customer: ”Never mind, you’re an idiot.” *click*