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    If The Zits Don’t Kill You, The Angst Will

    | San Francisco, CA, USA | Top

    Me: Hello this is [doctor's office], how may I help you?”

    Caller: “Help! I’ve sprouted a nipple on my forehead!”

    (From the caller’s voice, I could tell that it was a female teenager.)

    Me: “Excuse me? If this is a prank, I can report you–”

    Caller: “No, this is not a prank! This morning I got up, and there was this huge, red lump on my forehead…and now I’ve poked it and this milk is coming out!”

    Me: “Hon, that’s a pimple, not a nipple.”

    Caller: “Oh…” *gasps* “Is it deadly?”