If Only It Grew On Trees, Part 2

(I work in a local government call centre and take calls from the residents about all kinds of things–including education.)

Customer: “Hi, I got your booklet about the school meals and it said I can get a grant for clothing.”

Me: “That would be the school uniform grant. Could I take yours and your child’s details? I can send you an application form.”

Customer: “I don’t have kids, can’t I have the money for myself? I’m on income support.”

Me: “The grant is for the school uniform, sir, and it is only available for children.”

Customer: “So I can’t have the money for myself?”

Me: “Um… no.”

Customer: “For f***’s sake!” *hangs up*

(I wasn’t sure if he wanted the money for normal clothes, or wanted to buy himself an actual school uniform.)

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If Only It Grew On Trees