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    I Hear The Gossip Columns Are Juicy

    | Towson, MD, USA |

    (A customer walks in with a very full backpack.)

    Customer: “Hi, I’d like to trade you.”

    Me: “Um, we don’t actually trade things, we sell food.”

    Customer: “Well, I’ve got this whole bag of stuff for you.”

    (He opens the bag and shows me magazines, forks, and spoons.)

    Me: “Sir, you have to use money to buy the food.”

    Customer: “Let me talk to your manager.”

    (I call the manager, who walks over.)

    Customer: “Come on, man. This magazine must be worth at least…carrots.”

    Manager: “Here’s a trade for you: money for food.”

    Customer: *walks out*