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  • This Round He Lost (In Translation), Part 4
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    He’ll Raise The Dead And Validate Your Parking

    , | Toronto, Ontario, Canada | Crazy Requests, Health & Body

    (A woman comes in to my clinic with her 6-year-old daughter and approaches the receptionist.)

    Customer: “Hi, I need my daughter’s eyes fixed.”

    Employee: “Sorry?”

    Customer: “My daughter. She’s blind. I need you to fix it.”

    Employee: “Oh, um…is she totally blind? Can’t see a thing? How about light?”

    Customer: “No, she’s completely blind.”

    Employee: “I’m sorry ma’am, I don’t think we can help you. How long has she been this way?”

    Customer: “Oh, all her life. She was born blind.”

    Employee: “…why didn’t you look for help earlier?”

    Customer: “DON’T TELL ME HOW TO RAISE MY CHILDREN, MISSY!”

    (After listening in on the conversation, I decide step in.)

    Me: “Is there a problem here?”

    Customer: *pulls her daughter’s arm* “Yes. My daughter is blind and you need to fix it.”

    Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry, but there’s really nothing we can do. We don’t treat things like that here.”

    Customer: “NO! You call yourself an eye doctor! You must be able to fix her, and you WILL!”

    Me: “Like I said, I can’t do that.”

    Customer: “Well, god**** you all to h***! I’m going somewhere that will actually help us!”

    Me: “Ask Jesus, I heard he was good at that.”

    Customer: *storms out*