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    He’ll Be Back In The Future

    | Ireland | Movies & TV, Time

    (A regular customer comes up to me. He’s notorious for being rude, ignoring what we say to him and just generally wasting our time.)

    Regular: “Can you look up a music DVD for me?”

    Me: “Sure, what are you looking for?”

    Regular: I’m wondering if [band] released a DVD of their 45th anniversary concert. I saw it on TV a while back.”

    Me: “Okay, sir. I can see here that they don’t have a 45th anniversary concert DVD, but they do have a 35th anniversary concert DVD. Is that the one you’re looking for perhaps?”

    Regular: “Of course it’s not. Do I look like I’m stupid? I know what one I’m looking for and I’m looking for their 45th anniversary not the 35th anniversary!”

    Me: “Sorry, sir, it’s just that it says here that their 35th anniversary only happened 6 years ago. It would be impossible for them to have released a 45th anniversary DVD yet.”

    Regular: “What do you mean?”

    Me: “Well, there’s 10 years between a 35th anniversary and a 45th anniversary.”

    Regular: “Yeah, so?”

    Me: “So if their 35th anniversary happened in 2006 and there’s 10 years between 35 and 45…”

    Regular: *stares blankly*

    Me: “…their 45th anniversary won’t be out until 2016.”

    Regular: “But I saw it on TV!”

    Me: “Are you sure it wasn’t their 35th anniversary?”

    Regular: “Of course I’m bloody well sure!”

    Me: “Well then, I’m sorry sir the DVD you’re looking for is not available and won’t be for some time.”

    Regular: “Fine. Will you just give me a ring when you can get it for me?”

    Me: “Well, no, sir. The DVD doesn’t come out for another four years. I can’t even promise I’ll be here in four years when this DVD comes out.”

    Regular: “You insolent little b****! I’ll be back in next month and you better be able to get it for me by then! You’re useless!” *leaves the store in a huff*