Have Customer, Will Poke

(At the museum where I work, I see a patron knocking on one of our replicas with his knuckles.)

Patron: *to wife* “Hey, look, honey. This here is a replica!” *knocks again*

Me: “Sir, please don’t touch that.”

Patron: “But it’s a replica, isn’t it?”

Me: “Yes, it is, but we still ask that you don’t touch it.”

Patron: “Well, it’s not under a glass case, which means that it is not valuable. I have every right to touch it.”

Me: “No, actually–”

Patron: “Yes! If I see something that’s not cased, it means I can touch it, AND I WILL TOUCH IT!”