Me: “Okay, which sandwiches off the menu would you like?”

Customer: “I want olives.”

Me: “Yes, but what kind of meat, sauce, cheese? We have our recipes up there for you.”

Customer: “Look, all I want is olives. And sauerkraut.”

Me: “I don’t have any sauerkraut for you sir.”

Customer: “They have sauerkraut at other places! Like in Maine!”

Me: “But not here. I’m sorry. And we are not in Maine.”

Customer: *deadly serious and worried* “We’re not?”