(An irate customer is frustrated with my store’s return policy, and asks me to call my manager.)

Me: “I’m sorry, but she isn’t answering her cell phone or house number, but she’ll be in tomorrow if you want to try again then.”

Customer: “No! You get her on the phone now!”

Me: “I just called both of the numbers she provided, and she didn’t answer. That sort of leaves me with telepathy.”

Customer: “Well, could you try that?”