(I am working as a waitress in the middle of a city in Australia. We have a large outdoor dining area.)

Customer: *in an American accent* “Excuse me, Miss. I’d like to be moved.”

Me: “As we’re really busy, I’m not sure if we have any spare tables. Is it too hot out here for you?”

Customer: “No, I just don’t want to get my food stolen.”

Me: “By… who? Is someone stealing food?”

Customer: “By the kangaroos! I haven’t seen any today, though. I’ve heard they like to kick you and steal your food.”

Customer’s Australian Friend: “Dude, I was kidding.”

Customer: *shocked* “Oh my God, really?”