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    Fuel For (Lack Of) Thought

    | Salt Lake City, UT, USA |

    Me: “How can I help you?”

    Customer: “My son told me to get broadband I’d have to pay more money, but I told him that there was this thing from the phone company you put on your telephone chord that gave you broadband.”

    Me: “You mean a noise canceler, sir? That is only for DSL lines through the phone company, not through us.”

    Customer: “Diesel…yeah, that’s what I want! So, can you hook me up with diesel broadband?”

    Me: “Sir, I’m sorry we don’t offer D-S-L Lines. You have to call your phone company and have them installed.”

    Customer: “Do you have unleaded lines?”

    Me: “Sir, it’s DSL. Not diesel as in the fuel.”

    Customer: “You’re not a very good company then. You’re saying I can’t get diesel from you, but then telling me I can’t get unleaded either.”

    Me: “Sir, if you just call your phone company I am sure they can help you.”

    Customer: “Oh, okay then.”

    (The customer starts mashing numbers on the keypad without hanging up. I stay on the line.)

    Me: “Sir?”

    Customer: “I just talked to [my company] and they said you have diesel lines.”

    Me: “Sir you never hung up the phone. This is still [my name] from [my company name].”

    Customer: “Holy s***! You work for both places?”