Me: “Hello sir, welcome to [fast food]. What would you like today?”

Customer: *stares wide-eyed for a few moments* “Well, aren’t you the most adorable creature I have ever seen!”

Me: “Thank you, sir. Can I interest you in our special today?”

Customer: “I could just steal you and take you home in my wallet to live in my basement! My wife doesn’t like the basement, but it can be quite homey!”

Me: “That’s nice, sir.”

Customer: “Hurry! Into my wallet before anyone else decides to steal you!”