Following This Conversation Is Fruitless

(I’m in first period at school. We’re watching the morning announcements and the school counselor has come in to watch. The following interaction occurs after the announcements end.)

Teacher: “So, what do you think?”

Counselor: *distracted* “Oh… I was just looking at your board, and it said, ‘The impeachment of Andrew Johnson’, and I was just thinking about how it had the word ‘peach’ in it.”

Teacher: *looks confused*

Counselor: “Then I thought about how it should really be ‘im-grapefruit-ment’ because grapefruits are sour and getting impeached would be a sour experience.”

Teacher: *eyes begin glazing over*

Counselor: “Actually, I don’t like peaches, but I guess they’re good.”

Teacher: *blank stare*