Me: “Thank you for calling [Pool Store], how may I help?”

Caller: “How much would a new pump be for my pool?”

Me: “Have you got an in-ground or an above-ground?”

Caller: *long pause* “I don’t know.”

Me: “You don’t know?”

Caller: “No! How could I?”

Me: “Alright. Go into your back yard, and run at the pool. If you fall in, it’s probably an in-ground. If you bounce off, it’s an above-ground.”