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    Doctoring Under The Influence

    | Portland, OR, USA |

    (It’s St. Patrick’s Day at an Irish pub, and I’m serving a table with ten drunken customers.)

    Drunken table: “Hey! We need some more drinks over here! We’ve been waiting quite a while!”

    Me: “Sure, what can I get for you!”

    (They proceed to order 10 different, complex cocktail orders.)

    Me: “Great, I’ll get these into the bar as soon as possible.”

    (Five minutes later…)

    Lady at drunken table: “Hey! We’ve been waiting for our drinks! Where the h*** are they?!”

    Me: “Well, we’re pretty busy and the bar is backed up a bit. Sorry for the delay.”

    Lady at drunken table: “Well, we sure aren’t impressed with the service here. My husband is a doctor, and he’s on call tonight, so we really need our drinks served promptly!”

    Doctor at drunken table: “Yesshh, I need my drinksh right nooow!”