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    Diagnostic Scan Results: Crisp & Buttery

    , | North Somerset, UK |

    (A customer walks in and places a box on the desk in our repairs center.)

    Me: “Hello, how can I help you, sir?”

    Customer: “Can you fix this for me?”

    Me: *looking at box* “This is a toaster.”

    Customer: “Yes. Can you fix it? It’s broken.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, we only fix computers and computer peripherals here.”

    Customer: “But if you can fix computers, surely you can fix a toaster!”

    Me: “We don’t fix toasters, sir.”

    Customer: “Please? I’m sure it’s easy.”

    Me: “Even if we could fix it for you, you don’t have a repair warantee with us, so it would cost you ¬£50 just for us to look at it. You could buy two new toasters for that.”

    Customer: “¬£50?! What a rip-off! If it’s going to cost me that much, I’ll go elsewhere!”

    Me: “Have you tried the store you bought it from?”

    Customer: “Yes, and they wouldn’t fix it!”

    Me: “So you thought a computer store would?”

    Customer: *takes the toaster and walks out in a huff*