Desperate For Dessert

Customer: “Excuse me, do you sell pie here?”

Me: “Um, no this is [Department Store]. We sell clothes.”

Customer: “I don’t want clothes. I want pie.”

Me: “You can go across the street to the supermarket.”

Customer: “But I hear that your pie is the best in town.”

Me: “You’ve obviously heard wrong; we don’t sell pie here.”

Customer: “Don’t you lie to me! I know there’s pie! Where is it?!”

Me: “Sir, there is no pie…”

Customer: “F*** you, are you profiling me? Just because I’m African-American you won’t sell me pie? You’ll be hearing from my lawyer!”

Me: *giving up* “Okay sir, fine; you’re right. Go downstairs, go out the door, and walk across the street. That’s where we sell the pie.”

Customer: “It’s about time…”