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Must Work In A Mail-Dominated Profession

| Enid, OK, USA | Bizarre, Technology, Theme Of The Month

(A customer calls us after moving from here to another state. She wants a copy of her insurance verifications.)

Me: “Sure thing, where do you want me to email them to?”

Customer: “I don’t have an email account.”

Me: “Really?”

Customer: “I work for a living.”

Loyal Spoil

| MO, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests

Customer: “I want to order this product. Since I’m a loyal customer, can I have free shipping?”

Me: “No, I apologize that free shipping is only on select products, and those products are advertised as such on the website.”

Customer: “But, [Competitor] has a similar product with free shipping. Can you make an exception?”

Me: “No, I apologize that I can’t.”

Customer: “Guess I’m going to [Competitor] then!”

Me: “Thank you for being a ‘loyal’ customer!”

He Must Be A Theorist

| USA | Extra Stupid, Math & Science, Technology

(I support the scientists in a large research building. I get a call from one of them.)

Caller: “I need help removing my extended absence greeting from my voice mail.”

Me: “Okay, to do that you need to login to your voicemail and select option 4.”

Caller: “How do you do that?”

Me: “You press 4.”

Caller: “I don’t know how to do that. Can I get an onsite visit?”

Me: “We can’t generate an onsite visit for this issue; however, if you go to our intranet site there is a chart with all the menu options.”

Caller: “That’s too complicated.”

Me: “…you’re a scientist with several Ph.D.’s.”

Got Here At 7:58

scumbag-customer-meme

No Pranks, Just Thanks: The Comic

| Eugene, OR | Awesome Customers, Comics

Have a fun, festive Thanksgiving week with your family & friends!

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