July Theme Of The Month: Great Timing!

Archive for 2013

Jump to page:

Attack Of The Killer Tomato Customers

| South Tampa, FL, USA | Bad Behavior, Bigotry, Bizarre, Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month

(I am cashiering on the first express lane with one of our new hires on the second express lane. I’m cashing out a customer when I hear an outburst from the new girl’s line.)

Customer: “What are you doing?! Don’t touch my tomatoes! Leave them in the bag!”

New Cashier: *turns around, looks at me* “Help me, please?”

Me: *walks over* “Good afternoon, sir. How can I help you?”

Customer: “I bought these tomatoes, and she is taking them out of the bag and ringing them up separately! I want them rung up together!”

Me: “Well, sir, it looks like you bought 3 different tomato varieties.”

Customer: “So?”

Me: “Each variety is a different price per pound. To keep our inventory counts accurate, we have to weigh and ring these up separately.”

Customer: “I don’t want you touching my tomatoes!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but it is store policy.”

Customer: “I want to see a manager!”

Me: “Sure.”

(I flag down a supervisor, who is female.)

Supervisor: “What can I do for you, sir?”

Customer: “No! I want to talk to a manager!”

Supervisor: “I assure you, I’m a manager.”

Customer: “No! A man!”

Supervisor: *sighs* “I’ll be right back.”

(She returns with the store manager, who is male. He walks off with the now-livid customer.)

New Cashier: “Did he really pitch a fit over tomatoes?”

Me: “Yep. And I wouldn’t be surprised if he got them for free now.”

New Cashier: “No way.”

(15 minutes later, the supervisor returns.)

Supervisor: “Well, [store manager] just gave our angry customer his tomatoes for free.”

New Cashier: “What!?”

Me: “I told you!”

Getting Heated About A Lack Of Heated Food

| PA, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(I work at a soft serve ice cream shop. The building has a window to serve people outside, as the inside is rather small. A woman literally drives up to the window.)

Me: “Ma’am, this isn’t a drive through. Can you please park the car and order then?”

Customer: “Do you have cheeseburgers?”

Me: *confused* “Ma’am, this is an ice cream store. We don’t sell any hot foods.”

Customer: “Do you have hot dogs?”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry, but we have no hot dogs, cheeseburgers, or anything hot. But I’m sure that the restaurant down the road has those?”

Customer: “Can I have a large order of fries?”

Me: “Ma’am we don’t have fries.”

Customer: “Can I have a fish filet with ketchup?”

Me: “Ma’am, please: we don’t have any fish, fries, chicken, cheeseburgers, hot dogs, pasta, or pizza.”

Customer: *gives me a creepy stare*

Me: “Ma’am?”

(The customer yells incomprehensibly, stomps on the gas, and does a donut in the parking lot before speeding away.)

You Just Got Schooled, Part 3

| AZ, USA | Bigotry, School

(I worked in the tech repair department of computer electronics retailer. I walk up to the customer service desk to do an inspections for a coworker and a customer making a return.)

Coworker: *to me* “Hey, this customer is doing a return and we need the product inspected.”

Me: “Okay.”

(I inspect it and passively listen as the customer and coworker reminisce about the days when he was her soccer coach in a public high school a couple years back.)

Customer: “…yeah, things on the team aren’t like they used to be. With that recent rule change, they’re letting homeschoolers join our sports teams now too. The nerve of them taking positions from kids who are enrolled at the school and actually learning something! Those parents are uneducated idiots to prevent their kids from getting a good education.”

Coworker: “Wow, sounds like there are some issues to be worked out.” *looks at me* “Hey, weren’t you homeschooled?”

Me: “Yes I was, for six years into high school. My mother has a Bachelors in Teaching and father has a Bachelors in Science. I received four tech certifications before working here, and just graduated with a bachelor in Computer Information Systems.”

Customer: *stands their quietly, looking away*

Me: *to the customer* “Everything looks good. You can go ahead with the return.”

Related:
You Just Got Schooled, Part 2
You Just Got Schooled

Bigots And Sexists On Line One

| Berkeley, CA, USA | Bad Behavior, Bigotry, Theme Of The Month

(My family owns a private facial studio. The recorded message for voicemail where customers leave messages about appointments says that we will return your call within the hour. In this particular case, a message was left at one in the morning, so I call back as soon as I open.)

Caller: *answers phone groggily* “H-hello?”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, did I wake you up?”

Caller: “Yeah, you did. F*** you and goodbye.”

Me: *taken aback* “Well, this is [name] from [facial studio], and I’m returning your call about an appointment.”

Caller: “About time, b****. It’s been hours.”

Me: “Haha, well, you did call at one in the morning.”

Caller: “So?”

Me: “So not only was I fast asleep, I wasn’t even at the studio.”

Caller: “Well, you should have been. The only reason women like you work is to serve men like me.”

Me: *irritated* “Oh really? What do you do?”

Caller: “I’m a plumber. I do all the hard work that pansies like you can’t deal with, so when I want a treat, I expect every b**** to get ready for me.”

Me: “I’m sorry about that, sir.”

Caller: “Eh? Sorry?”

Me: “I only work with polite customers.”

(I could hear his yells and swearing as I hung up the phone.)

Related:
Bigots And Sexists On Aisle 4

Homeless Is Where The Heart Is

| Atlanta, GA, USA | Awesome Customers, Top, Transportation

(I am taking the local subway home after work. Most of the subway customers/passengers are dressed as typical office workers except for one man across from me, who is very shabby looking—dirty patch-work clothes, hair dirty and scraggly, beard wild and unkempt—and has a large, filthy shopping bag full of what looks like all of his worldly possessions, including blankets, dirty yellow pillows and an old desk lamp. Everybody on the train is deliberately trying to look away from him, save one well-dressed man. As the train moves through the stations, the well-dressed man switches seats to be closer to the old man and strikes up a conversation.)

Well-Dressed Young Man: *amiably and loudly* “What a fine day it is today! How are you today, sir?”

Ragged-Looking Old Man: *just as amiably and loudly* “I’m doing great, just great. Hope you are, too! Got a lot to do, not enough hours in the day to get it done!”

Young Man: “That’s what I thought. You look like a respectable, busy kind of guy! Like the kind of guy who has some good business going on!”

Old Man: “Why, yeah I am! I’m a bid’ness man! Got some projects I’m takin’ care of! I’m sorry I ain’t at my best. I left my bud’ness suit at home, you see! But I’m still out here takin’ care of m’projects!”

Young Man: “Yes, like I said, I’ve got a keen eye for the entrepreneurial types, and you seem the kind of guy who has a lot of good business going on! And I think you’d make a wise investment!”

(By now, I’m openly watching these two talk like they’re a couple of old business partners. The rest of the train, though still trying not to be obvious, is stealing glances, and everybody’s stopped what they were doing so they can hear.)

Young Man: *still amiably* “I think I’d like to help fund one of your projects! Would $60 be enough to start?”

Old Man: *also still amiably* “Why, yeah sir, it would! I thin’ I can put the money to proper use in m’projects! Thank yah for your help!”

(The young man pulls out and hands $60 in cash to the old man.)

Young Man: “Pleasure doing business! By the way, it looks like you’ve misplaced your jacket.”

(It is winter, and the old man only has a shirt on.)

Old Man: “Yeah, like I said, it’s at home with my business suit.” *laughs* “Like I say, you caught me when I was just going out to look around and do some shopping.” *holds up bag*

Young Man: *chuckles* “Yeah, I’m going to do some shopping when I get home, myself. Well, I wouldn’t want the man who’s project I’m funding to get sick before he has a chance to make use of my investment! That’s bad business! Here, you can borrow my jacket until you can get home to get yours.”

(The young man takes off his suit jacket—easily worth $200—and hands it to the old man.)

Old Man: “Thank ya’ again, sir! And again, I’ll put that money to good use, don’t you worry!”

Young Man: “I’m sure you will, and I’m looking forward to the results! A pleasure doing business, and have a good day.”

(The old man gets off at the next stop. The young man’s stop and mine were the same, and as he rushed off to get out of the cold and home, I ran to catch up. As we walked, I told him that I’ve never seen anyone do anything like that before, and that he’s shown me the true path of generosity. I’ve not seen either of them since, but after that day, I’ve made sure that no matter how bad times get for me, I always reserve at least $50 and a few volunteer hours for charity a month, and a little bit of extra cash on hand for those I come across who need it most!)

Page 469/477First...467468469470471...Last