(I am volunteering at the info booth for a festival. A festival attendee approaches the table.)
Me: “Hi! Can I help you?”
Attendee: “Do you see those vapor trails?”
(The attendee points to the sky, where a few contrails are visible.)
Attendee: “That’s how the government controls the weather.”
(The attendee walks away like nothing happened.)
Me: “…oooookay then.”
(I work at a canoe centre. We occasionally get people complaining about things they don’t like; we have a feedback form for this. A couple walks in, looking angry.)
Me: “Hi! Did you enjoy your day?”
Customer #1: “No, it was horrible!”
Me: “Oh, okay, well if you want to fill in the feedback form about why, that’d be helpful. Can I ask why?”
Customer #2: “Well, we got wet of course!”
Me: “But you went canoeing on a river?”
Customer #1: “Yes, but you should have told us we could get wet!”
(I am working behind the register on my first ever day of employment. It is also a particularly busy day. I am finalizing the purchase and handing the customer her bag…)
Me: “Thank you for shopping at [Store]; have a nice day!”
(The customer snaps her head up, gasping, while simultaneously dropping her bag of goods to the floor.)
Customer: “What did you say?”
Me: “I thanked you for shopping here, and told you to have a good d—”
Customer: “I know what you said! You told me to have a good DEATH!”
Me: “Ma’am, I can assure you that I did not say anything of the kind.”
Customer: “You DID! You DID and it’s YOU that should be dying, YOU B****! I can assure you that I’ll be taking this further!”
(There is an unimpressed looking customer next in line.)
Next Customer: “Lady, pick up your s*** and get out of here, or I’ll kill you myself.”
Want to win a Not Always Right t-shirt?
Enter Not Always Right’s November Themed Story Giveaway:
Entering is as easy as 1-2-3:
- Submit a funny or interesting story about customers behaving bizarrely.
- Enter your email address in the form to qualify.
- All posted stories will be entered in a drawing to win a free t-shirt gift certificate, to use in the official Not Always Right shop!
PS: Congratulations to a lucky reader for winning October’s Themed Story Giveaway, which featured stories about Liars & Scammers. The winning submission: Little Console-ation In This Situation (1,363 thumbs up).
PS #2: winners will be announced the first Wednesday of every month. Next free t-shirt gift certificate: Wednesday, December 4!