(I work for a well known camera brand in their technical and customer support department. A customer calls in with quite an angry tone.)
Customer: “I have bought a lens for my camera and the lens cap is stuck on it and won’t come off. This is the second lens of this kind I have had. I had to get the first one replaced for the same issue. There is clearly a fault with this lens.”
Me: “I am very sorry to hear of your issue, sir. Can I ask what lens it is you have and where you bought it from?”
Customer: “It is a [lens model], and I bought it from [store]’s online store.”
Me: “Thank you. Can you please explain in what way you are having difficulty in getting the lens cap off?”
(I ask this because the lens cap normally just twists off, and it would be very unlikely for it to be stuck on purchasing the lens.)
Customer: “What a stupid question! I am turning it like on all my other lens. They’re supposed to twist off!”
Me: “Have you tried turning it the other way sir?”
(There’s a long pause while the customer fiddles with their camera.)
Customer: “…Well, it should be clearer.” *click*
(My uncle is gay, but isn’t flamboyant. He works as a service advisor at a car dealership. He is scheduling an appointment for an elderly customer.)
Uncle: “All right. So, if you come in next week we can fix your car. However, I am going to be on vacation next week, so you’ll need to see [other service advisor].
Customer: “Ah, that’s all right. Where are you heading to?”
Uncle: “I’m going to Cape Cod.”
Customer: “Well, be careful up there.”
Customer: “Cause up there’s Queersville.”
Uncle: “Uh… excuse me?!”
Customer: “Queersville; it’s full of f**s!”
Uncle: *calmly* “Thank you for warning me. I’ll be sure to tell my boyfriend, cause he sure hates f**s!”
Customer: *turns pales and leaves*
On The Straight And Narrow (Minded), Part
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Crimes & Punishments!
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