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I Yam Not Impressed

| New Zealand | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

Customer: “Don’t put the apples in the bag with the potatoes! They’ll get bruised!”

Me: “The apples are in top, ma’am.They won’t get bruised.”

Customer: “But the potatoes are heavy; they’ll bruise the apples! Geez, don’t you know anything!?”

(I put the apples in a separate bag. I’m careful not to put anything in with the potatoes, as they might get bruised. The other bags are pretty full, and the last item is a bag of loose lettuce.)

Me: “Would you like this in a separate bag?”

Customer: “No, that can go on top of the potatoes. There’s plenty of space.”

The Navi Ending Story

| Hobart, Tasmania, Australia | Awesome Customers, Food & Drink, Movies & TV, Top

(An elderly couple is doing their grocery shopping and among their items is the ‘Avatar’ DVD.)

Me: “Oh, you are buying Avatar. I haven’t seen it yet, but I’ve heard really good things about it. ”

Elderly Woman: “Oh, that’s nice. Our grandchildren told us to watch it. ”

(We keep talking about the movie for the rest of the transaction.)

Elderly Woman: “I’ll tell you what: if we don’t like it, we’ll come back in and give it too you so you can watch it.”

(Next day…)

Elderly Man: “We started watching Avatar yesterday. We didn’t get very far into it as we weren’t enjoying it much. We are going to try finishing it tonight.”

(A couple of days later…)

Elderly Man: “Well, we tried watching it twice. We really didn’t like it. If are you working tomorrow morning, I’ll bring it in for you.”

Me: “I’m afraid I’m only working in the afternoon.”

Elderly man: “Okay, we’ll leave it at the front desk for you to collect when you come in.”

(I buy them a box of chocolates as a thank you and leave it at the desk with my co-worker.)

Co-worker: “The elderly couple left the DVD for you, and they were ecstatic with the chocolates. The lady hadn’t received anything for Mother’s Day, so she said it made her week!”

No Proof In Purchase

| Wiltshire, England, UK | Family & Kids, Food & Drink, Hotels & Lodging, School

(We have a school prom in our function room. Whenever we have a prom, we run a ‘dry’ bar. We will not serve the students at the main bar. One of the teachers approaches the bar and slams a bottle down on the counter.)

Teacher: “I just took this from one of my students. He is 16!”

Me: “Ma’am, it’s—”

Teacher: “This is a disgrace; you’ve broken the law. Who served him! Was it you?”

Me: “It’s a—”

Teacher: “I want to speak to your manager.”

Me: “I understand why you’re upset, but—”

Teacher: “We won’t have another prom here! Selling alcohol to kids—”

Me: “It’s a non alcoholic beer. There is no alcohol behind the bar tonight and no one here would serve anyone underage anyway.”

Teacher: “Oh, God. I’m so sorry. I’d better give this back to him.”

A Cut And (Blow)Dry Case Of Mistaken Identity

| VA, USA | Bad Behavior, Wild & Unruly

(I’m in the waiting room of a salon. A man walks in and approaches the receptionist. Alarmingly, he’s carrying a claw hammer.)

Man: “I need to see [name].”

Receptionist: “Let me see… do you know what she’s here for?”

Man: “B**** works here.”

Receptionist: “I’m sorry, but no one works here by that name.”

Man: “She tell you to cover for her? Get her a** down here now.”

Receptionist: “I’m going to have to ask you to leave.”

Man: “Alright, you get her fat a** down here now, or I’ll learn you a thing or two. Five… four… three… two… one!”

(The second he hits one, he swings the hammer into the desk. The receptionist screams and takes cover. The man swings the hammer and yells.)

Man: “Try to take my kids from me? B****, you’re gonna get fired for sure now, come out before someone gets hurt!”

(The police respond quickly and subdue the guy. As the cops take our statements, the man is raving about how his ex-wife has taken his kids, and how this showed her, and how her boss here would fire her. The kicker? All the employees agreed they had never heard of the woman!)

They Are Rotten To The Corps

| MI, USA | Bad Behavior, Military, Top, Wild & Unruly

(I am working late at my video store. Two customers enter, bad mouthing the military. As I prepare to suggest they keep it to themselves, one of the customers in the store beats me to it; a little 4′ 9″ woman I know to be a regular. She plants herself in front of the louder of the two guys, sticks out her hands and challenges them both.)

Woman: “Do you actually know anyone in the military, or have you ever been in the military?”

Large Guy: *mumbles something* “…not that desperate for money…” *mumbles*

Woman: “Well my husband is a Marine, so you shut up!”

(She kicks him in the knee. He screams and leaves, taking his buddy with him. As I make my way to speak with her, the only other customer in the store, a big bear of a guy, introduces himself to her.)

Other Customer: “Hi, I’m a former Navy Seal. I was on my way to take him apart, but I liked your way better!”

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