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    Archive for 2013

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    She Let It Get To Her Head

    | Columbus, OH, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests

    (A customer comes to the counter with an expensive hair treatment.)

    Customer: “Excuse me, this appears to be used. Do you have any others?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. We just finished putting our stock away. If that was the last one on the shelf, then it’s the last one we have.”

    Customer: “Well, I suppose I’ll get it anyway. I’ve never tried it before, but I pumped some out and it does feel very nice.”

    Me: “Ma’am, were you the one that opened and used it?”

    Customer: “Yes, but I had to see what it was like before I spent all this money on it! Now, are you sure there aren’t any more in the back? I really don’t want to buy something that’s been used!”

    The Tooth Hurts

    | Auckland, New Zealand | Awesome Customers, Food & Drink

    (On my way out of the store, I spot an employee who is supposed to be greeting new customers. He is slumped over his ‘Welcome’ stand, half asleep.)

    Me: “C’mon buddy, it’s not that bad. The day is almost over.”

    Employee: “Yeah, but I really need a coffee. I’m so tired, man.”

    (I go to the in-store cafe and buy the guy a coffee. An hour later, I return to the shop, having forgotten some items. I spot the same employee with a bandage around his jaw.)

    Me: “What happened, buddy?”

    Employee: *not recognizing me* “Some guy bought me coffee. I have really sensitive teeth, so now I got major toothache.”

    (Guess I didn’t make his day any better!)

    Purchasing Blood Wine

    | Atlanta, GA, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Food & Drink, Underaged

    (I see two guys who appear to be in their early 20s approach a self-checkout machine with a case of alcohol. One of them appears to have some tissue in his nose. The other is acting nervous. Given the exchange of money between the two, I suspect a third party purchase.)

    Me: “Good evening, gentlemen. I’ll just need to see both of your IDs before I approve the sale.”

    (The customer with the item in his nose scowls and turns his nose up at me, revealing the dangling string of a tampon.)

    Customer: *angrily* “Why do you need to see his ID? I’m buying it.”

    Me: “Sir, it’s the law and store policy that I check the IDs of everyone in the party purchasing alcohol.”

    Customer: “I guess I’m not buying this then, since he’s under 21!”

    (He storms off, leaving alcohol on counter.)

    Customer at the next machine: “What the h*** was that? Did he really just try that? And with a tampon in his nose?”

    A Dogged Request, Part 2

    | OH, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Pets & Animals

    (I am a cashier at a pet store that has a grooming salon. The customer is a very snotty woman who has a ticket from the groomers to ring up.)

    Customer: “I have a complaint about the service!”

    Me: “I’m sorry to hear that. I can get a manager for you to speak to.”

    Customer: “I don’t want to speak to a manager.”

    Me: “Well, maybe I can help you. What seems to be the problem?”

    Customer: “I got this grooming and styling service for my Pomeranian, and the groomers asked if I’d like bows in her hair!”

    Me: “Okay. I’m not understanding what the problem is.”

    Customer: “I told them that would be alright. So I just got my dog back, and they did it all wrong. I don’t like the color of the ribbons they used. They’re ugly.”

    Me: “They used a different color than what you specified? Did you ask them to use different ones?”

    Customer: “No, I didn’t ask for any other color. I just don’t like them.”

    Me: “Oh, well I’m sorry about that. I hope you have a nice day.” *continues to ring her up*

    Customer: “Wait a minute, aren’t you going to do something?”

    Me: “Well, if you don’t like the color, I’m sure the groomer will be happy to let you pick out different ribbons.”

    Customer: “I don’t want to.”

    Me: “If they’re that ugly you could always just remove them.”

    Customer: “I don’t want to do that. I want you to do something about it.”

    Me: “Ma’am, I’m just the cashier. The employees in the salon would be able to help you.”

    Customer: “I don’t want to talk to them. They are the ones who messed up. Why can’t you do something?”

    Me: “I’m just a lowly cashier. A manager might be able to arrange a solution for you.”

    Customer: “I already told you, I don’t want to talk to a manager!”

    (The line is getting backed up, and other customers are grumbling.)

    Me: “I don’t know what you expect me to do to help you. I’ve offered solutions. You don’t want the issue to be corrected. You don’t want to talk to anyone in the correct department. You just want me to do ‘something’. Why are you complaining to the cashier but refuse to talk to anyone else?”

    Customer: “Well… I don’t think I should have to pay for this! I think I should at least get a discount!”

    Me: “I see, so you’re complaining to me because I’m running the register, and you don’t want the problem corrected because you want something for nothing. Sorry, but you’ve received an $80 grooming, styling and nail cutting service. The ribbons are complimentary and not included. You already got them for free.”

    Customer: *flustered* “I… how dare you try to accuse a paying customer? This is slander! You should be fired for speaking to me that way! I want to speak to your manager!”

    (Just then, another customer in line behind her speaks up.)

    Customer In Line: “No, you didn’t want to speak to a manager, remember?! Why don’t you let actual paying customers, who aren’t trying to rip this place off, buy our stuff and go home?”

    Customer: “Are you going to let him verbally attack me like that? I demand you do something!”

    Me: “Okay, that’s it! I’m calling the manager…”

    (When the manager comes out and listens to her story, the other customer makes sure he hears my side. The manager asks one of the groomers if the woman had complained or asked for different ribbons. According to the groomer, the customer had told them everything was fine and the dog looked great. In the end, the customer is escorted aside to pay like a delinquent, while hanging her head in humiliation the whole time.)

    Related:
    A Dogged Request

    If You Don’t Mind

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