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    Shaming Special On The Pre-Wedding Aisle

    | NY, USA | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids

    (I am in a grocery store with my two-year-old nephew. I am 22, and wearing my engagement ring.)

    Other Customer: “Hey, you!”

    Me: “Me?”

    Other Customer: “Yeah, you. You should be ashamed of yourself.”

    Me: “What?”

    Other Customer: “It’s bad enough that teenagers like you seem to think you can just sleep with people. Then you have kids and try to act like you could raise them!”

    Me: He’s—”

    Other Customer: “It’s things like this that show me that you have absolutely no respect for this country! The entire country is going down the tubes. It’s appalling to think that you would ever even consider having a child outside of wedlock.”

    (An employee comes into the aisle to stock things, but overhearing the other customer’s comments speaks up in my defense.)

    Employee: “Hey, are you going to even let her talk? She doesn’t have to, but I think she’s entitled to respond to the things you’re saying.”

    Other Customer: “You keep out of this. There is nothing she can say to make it any better.”

    Me: “Actually, there is. One, this is my nephew. Two, I’m 22, which means if he were my child, I would have been twenty when he was born. Third, his parents are married and have been since before he was even conceived. Fourth, before you start flying off about unmarried people, you may want to check their ring hand.” *I hold up my hand* “I’m engaged, but you couldn’t know I wasn’t married. Fifth, even if I was 17, and this was my child, and I wasn’t married, why would it be any of your business?”

    (The customer doesn’t say anything, and slowly walks away. I turn to the employee.)

    Me: “Thanks.”

    Employee: “No problem. That actually turned out as well as it possibly could have. I was mostly saying it so you could just say, ‘None of your business’. It’s even better that none of the things that she was accusing you of were true.”

    First Customer Of The Day

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    I’d Love To Get My Manager

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    Slightly Gross Story

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    Bigotry Unleashed

    | Yonkers, NY, USA | Awesome Workers, Bigotry, Top

    (A gay couple has just met up in the restaurant and kissed each other upon arrival. Another customer has seen this and is obviously angry.)

    Angry Customer: “Damn f**s.”

    Gay Man: “Excuse me?”

    Angry Customer: “You heard me, you little s***. Let’s not make this into some little pride protest, okay? I have to accept that you’re going to live your lifestyle, and you have to accept that I’ve got freedom of speech.”

    Gay Man: *quietly* “Is it too much to ask for a little human decency?”

    Angry Customer: “Human? Listen up, what you’re doing is not human. I think I have the right to determine what I think is human.”

    (The manager shows up. He’s a quiet Italian man who I assume is conservative due to the Christian imagery and portrait of Reagan he keeps around the restaurant.)

    Angry Customer: *to the owner* “Hey, can you move either them or us to another table?”

    (Instead of responding to the angry customer, the owner instead speaks to his wife.)

    Owner: “I’m sorry ma’am, but we have a strict ‘no pets’ policy in my restaurant.”

    Wife: “Uh, I, uh, what? I don’t have a—”

    Owner: “Well, according to your talking monkey over here, I can determine who’s a human and who’s not. You bring an animal into my restaurant; I gotta assume it’s your pet.”

    (The angry customer storms out. When I left, the owner was giving his description, and copies of security camera footage, to the biggest crowd of police I’ve seen. Apparently it’s a bad idea to not pay your bill at a restaurant that gives free coffee to cops.)


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